Have to be me.

As the airplane left Florida bringing us back to a world I’d not been part of, my thoughts were of the life we'd just lived, comparing, knowing what we were headed for. I thought of the differences between VanGogh and Matisse. VanGogh the complicated, and tortured, Matisse the simple, yet not so simple. I could see the difference and again, this was not a coincidence but, I believe, a signal.

At work I had no backers, no projects, and the signs there were I was to go, they would not change. The process would not change. I was not unprepared, just as an example, what you're reading was underway, and previous works had been completed over an eight year period. In March I'd hired

an agent, literary, to see what would happen and was prepared to leave my corporate life for something that gave me pleasure, never money. The question answered by ATTACK was "if the

place that pays you money kills you by taking away what's inside you, and you let it, what are you?”

People have always been upset with my answers to questions like that; usually I'd just left under a heap of abuse. If I had just a thing or two, it was lost along the way. It's been like that, but I'm still here, writing, painting, and my boys look me in the eye and life goes on. I'm trying to say we are all exposed to the same conditions and questions. It's not special talents that make differences, it's the

use of these special talents by everybody, because everybody has them, that is the hope and the direction of tomorrow.

Writing and painting are my way to express the same thought a person who makes, or sings a song,

or someone who creates pottery, or does a good crossword. In the world, so many people are doing what they think they "have" to do, not what they want to do and consequently the world is full of

hurt, and hurtful people.

I'm saying look into your self and do what you love without thinking of consequences.

God takes care of the true spirits.