I Love you, my sons …

Sometimes things

get hard to explain

especially to little men

who couldn't understand.

You won't see me

at the end of each day,

but my heart still belongs

to the two of you.

I could not live

in the place where we were

and I would not

let my self be killed.

It wasn't for freedom

or love of another,

but the need to be

that took me away.

Now I sit

covered in thought

hoping somehow

I can still be your daddy.

I see your faces

as I close my eyes

and I love you my sons

from my place now alone.

I'm hoping there's me

inside both of you

and because of that

one day you'll understand.

I'm hoping we can

be what we we're intended to be,

and that time

will be a friend of ours.

I'm hoping that you will

someday, understand this

for if you do

you'll know how much I love you.

I'm hoping for a lot

because you're my sons,

and because I believe

I'm better alive.

I'm hoping I'm right

and that we'll survive

while the wounds of this summer

heal and disappear.

Most of all

I'm hoping for hope

to carry us through

these near, dark niqhts.